A comparison of how dating has changed over the last 40 years.
Unlike now where couples are more likely to meet online on Tinder or on social media, back in the 80s it was very different. Some may say life was simpler and dating was easier. We got an insight into how different life and relationships were by speaking to a couple from Merseyside, Helen and Andrew, about their 38-year relationship, which began way back in 1984. The Power Of Love was the number one for that year - how ironic aye.
They began attending clubs at the age of 16 as at the time there was no ID checks, all you needed to do was remember a date of birth. One club they went was Jimmy’s in Birkenhead, which at the time allowed smoking inside, due to this and condensation from club-goers, it caused liquid to drip down on to the dance-floor. Imagine that happening now?
"Going out to a club was a lot different, you’d go out with ten pounds have the best night of your life, buy scran, pay for a taxi, and sometimes have change. You were also on name to name basis with the bouncers, DJ's and everyone else in the club, as well as receiving birthday invitations from nightclubs. None of that happens today, an average night out with a takeaway and a taxi costs at least £40"
Helen tells us: "Pre-drinks back in our day was spent sewing fabric together to make a dress to go out in. Bevvies consisted of aussie white wine, hooch and home-made vodka". Whereas pre’s now are spent downing porn star martinis, jaeger-bombs and taking so many selfies that you end up late and have to tell the taxi driver you love him and your sorry, followed by “You been busy tonight?”.
So back to the dating aspect. Helen states after a year or so of her going out locally, she then went to Liverpool, after a few pubs they ended up in Bierkeller and a drunk guy was dancing on the table and fell off, which to this day is her husband. They both got chatting and ended up taking each other’s house numbers, back then you had to arrange a date by going to the phone box and ringing. There was no snapchat or Facebook as you didn’t have mobiles, and you had to speak to their parents if they answered the phone. There were no reading messages over and over to reassure yourself they're interested and checking how many Instagram posts they’d liked - if a person was interested the only way to show it was in person.
The following day after meeting, Andy picked up Helen in his yellow capri and they went the pub. It wasn’t normal to go out for food as it was expensive and there were no cheap places like Nando’s or Waga Mamas. Going the cinema to see popular films at the time such as Purple Rain or Dirty Dancing cost a few pounds whereas now it’s Netflix and Chill and both sharing an Uber eats.
During the 80’s, being official with someone was much easier as you agreed to get together if the first date went well which happened with Helen and Andrew, even though Helen states she couldn’t remember his name for two weeks after. Compared with this day and age where you already know everything about someone from their social media: Mum’s name, what school they went and when they broke up with their ex. People in society today will date and speak online for months being ‘friends with benefits’ or they will label it as just ‘seeing each other’.
Cat-fishing didn’t exist in the 80’s and nowadays photographs posted on Tinder and Bumble are less reliable than having beer goggles in a club after a few drinks. There wasn’t Love Island or First Dates to help you meet someone. Back then you had to go out and if you liked someone, you would ask them out.
Helen and Andrew dated for three years and got married in 1987. Unlike today where it's quite common to jet off to the Caribbean, it was either get married in a registry office or a church. Both of them have said they knew after meeting each other once or twice that they would get married. Now you have to know someone for 10 years before getting engaged and wait another year until it's Facebook official.
In the 1980s people had little options as dating was limited to the area where you lived. People married their ‘high-school sweetheart’ but perhaps this was because it was harder to meet other people? Long-distance relationships were not a thing either, as there wasn’t really any way of meeting someone from half way up the country. The most long-distance relationship this couple had was when Andrew started training for his job in Germany and would send Helen letters and postcards. Whereas if this was in 2020, the only love letters you’ll get is someone sending you a cringey message on Tinder or tag you in a TikTok.
Communication is the key to a successful relationship and this may have been the case in the 80s, however, now people get the ick after a few weeks. Modern dating really is vastly different compared to a relationship in the 80s, which would you prefer?